something i wrote about how life goes too fast.
I was still so young when I started having these big dreams. I didn’t want to be something big, I wanted to be someone who made an impact on everyone. I wanted change. I realized as I grew older how hard this would be to do. I started taking pills to ease some of the stress and soon figured out I was sleeping through the days that would have got me further. I started drinking and each sip just drowned me more. It was a half-full cup, but I was still sinking. I turned to my friends, but they were so into this ordinary life with the same routines that I had no choice but to branch off to another part of this place and do it alone. I said, “I dream it alone, why not do it alone?” I had no money. I decided working at a local convenient store and saved all the money I could. I forgot to mention I still lived at home paying no bills, except my parents were low-life drug addicts who made money selling drugs. I don’t remember the last time I spoke to them. So anyways, I worked at this store where everybody, I mean everybody, stood proud. They stood proud to make minimum wage and have the time and money to support and feed 3 kids. I knew I had to get out of here soon. You’re probably wondering what is it I really want to do. I love music. However, I cannot play any instruments. In high school I always tried but It was too time consuming and I couldn’t get past music theory. What do I do? I asked myself this question every morning. I looked at the calender one day and it was my 30th birthday. I was single, I still worked at that convenient store and still lived with my parents. My mother had passed away a few years back. To be honest, I didn’t care much. I felt bad for my dad though. I kept dreaming but it just never seemed to find reality. I am now 63 years old living my last few weeks with pancreatic cancer. I dreamt it alone and I am still alone.
